★★★★★★

I asked for Jason, your Chief Poop Remover, specifically. I read somewhere that he’s literally the best at this job.

He did not disappoint! I gave him six stars, even though the scale only goes up to five stars. I hope that’s okay.

My only complaint is that I gave Jason my personal phone number, and I’ve texted him several times over the last few days, but he must be busy because he hasn’t replied.

I can’t blame him, though. He changes lives. He changed mine.

I hope he remembers me.